1. The obvious: MySpace.com is owned by NewsCorp. And NewsCorp is owned by one of the most evil men alive, Rupert Murdoch. Yes, that's opinion, but it's a widely held one. And if you don't have an opinion, then click on his name up there and read "Recent activities" and "Murdoch and Politics," then tell me he isn't evil. Or you could just ask his 3 wives. In July 2005, MySpace.com, its servers, it's employees, and all of it's 90 million plus (at the time) readers was quietly purchased by NewsCorp. Why? Could it be that having 106 million (current) young people telling you exactly what they want is the best market research around? Or maybe the fact that the site generates more advertising revenue than Yahoo!? After all, that many captive viewers only comes around once a year (hint: think football game). So why is this evil, you might ask? Well, I'll tell you: MySpace was designed to be a place where bands could get their music out to the public for free. That's it. It's not a corporate tool. It's not supposed to be another link in the chains that corporations use to bind us and control us. How, you ask? How many MySpace friends have you met in real life? And how many of them do you think are being paid to pass on a band or movie? Think I'm paranoid? Think it's bullshit? Well, I've got 4 words for you: Snakes. On. A. Plane.
2. The Experts: PC World magazine rated MySpace as #1 in the 25 worst websites. Why? Well, you can read the full article here. But to summarize: MySpace is poorly designed. Users can upload pictures, audio, video, and all kinds of other kak onto their pages. The metaphor that PC World used was that most pages are more cluttered than a "teenager's bedroom after a tornado." And it's true. Have you ever seen some of these pages? The wallpaper is mind warping, then there's the Flash movies of photos that go on forever and ever, usually with some kind of lame ass music in the background. And god help you if there' s a video that auto loads: even the fastest of computers with the fastest of connections can be slowed to a mere crawl by just one of these pages. And that doesn't even touch on the REAL menace of some MySpace pages: spyware, spamware, and, the one your Congressman has been harping on all year, predators. Some pages have spyware and spamware embedded into them so that simply loading that link your new friend sent can put all kinds of fun porn on your computer. Yeah! And how do you really know who that new friend is? I mean, he can look at your site and know all about you before he even asks to be your friend. Isn't it weird that you both like the same kinds of music and movies, and his favorite movie is Princess Mononoke too! Oh wow!
3. The War on Drugs: How many of you out there communicate with your friends through MySpace more than through real space? When was the last time you actually went out and had dinner with most of your MySpace friends? And just what the hell does "OMFG ur soooooooooooooo cute LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!" mean, anyway? Since when is that a form of communication? What exactly does this bode for the future? I mean, if you spend more time online updating your page and looking at your friend's pages, when do you have time to actually talk to your friends? When do you go to the bar and just hang out? I'm just waiting for the story about the guy/girl who is suing their boss because they were fired for being on MySpace. It's only a matter of time. And the only people who are worse than MySpacers are Blackberry users. So that's where you are: if you use MySpace, you're only one step above that annoying prick who sits on the train or in the subway, in the waiting room or, god help him, in TRAFFIC tapping away on that horrible little Crackberry, like he's so important he just can't be away from the office for 10 seconds without writing an email. So there you have it: MySpace.com is just as destructive to the lives of it's users as drugs like heroine or cocaine. It's all they think about, it's their entire life. And if you don't use it, they don't really care to know you, because you're not a part of their world.
Special bonus 4th reason why MySpace is evil: All those people that you've known throughout your life that you thought you never had to see again? Yeah, well, they've found your MySpace profile, and they still want to be your friend! Goody!
So, on a completely unrelated topic, I'm going to use this little piece of the internet for scientific research. Ok, well, maybe not that lofty, but amusing still. I'm going to try out a poll here, and if all 3 of you reading this fill it out, we might know a little more than we did 10 minutes ago. So here it is: 9/11 poll: was 9/11 a government conspiracy? Or are the people saying that just a bunch of crackpots? Well, here's your chance to speak up. And it's for science!
Ok well, that's all for now kids. Tune in soon for my next rant: the really bad gig, starring Ian Anderson from Jethro Tull! And: stupid headlines. All on our next episode!
"My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular."
2 comments:
For someone who finds Rupert Murdoch pure evil and is comparing MySpace to a crackwhore's cocaine addiction, you sure did have a nice long rant about it. It's almost as though by protesting so much, you're giving in to it's evilness.
I'm a loser for leaving yet another comment on this same entry..but Jameson told me that I needed to post my "About Me" section from MY myspace here.
About me:
If you think about it, the About Me section is very philosophical. It forces you to really think about who you are. Who I am is basically a voyeuristic, addictive, internet whore. I love peeking in on the lives of other people and MySpace just so happens to be the perfect avenue to do that. Now, you're probably reading this right now like wtf, Lindsay's a stalker! And well, I might have to say you're right. But I swear I'm not a stalker in the creepy sense. I mean, you're not going to see my head popping up against your bedroom window at 3am. Chances are though if you peak out your window at some random hour of the night, you could possibly see me driving by lol. Don't worry, don't worry...I usually only do that to people I don't like :) Besides having creepy-ish hobbies, I enjoy many other things. I absolutely love to make fun of other people and have a laugh at their expense. Some people might say it's mean but well...fuck you. There are people out there that deserve to get made fun of; certainly not all and if you aren't one of those people but get made fun of anyway..isn't that just how the cookie crumbles? Make fun of those people as your hobby and stop giving me grief. Other than that, my other hobbies are pretty mundane. I like to rant about our pathetic government and how no matter how much Angelina Jolie donates her time and money to the poor people, she can't possibly save the world because she cannot finance other people's governments and stop corruption. I also highly enjoy telling people that, as a Jew, I am a Jesus Killer. This is HIGHLY offensive to many people and please be assured that I don't mean it as offensive - I just find it absolutely hysterical. But then again, mocking religion and religious figures in general gives me great kicks. Other than that, I really am a nice, caring person. I swear. :)
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