Well, here we are, in the lovely town of Indianapolis. Today, we're playing at the Egyptian Room, which looks exactly like you think. I think I've come up with a surefire gauge for how well a tour is going: when the stagehands you have today are dumber than the stagehands you had yesterday, your tour is not going well. At all. Period. I'm not looking forward to load out tonight.

I think it's kinda sad, actually, that Detroit, that city I loathe so much, has been the bright spot of the last week or so. The hands at the State theatre (sorry, Live Channel, but I will not call it the Fillmore. Ever.) were awesome. Everything went so smooth, I almost don't hate Detroit anymore.

So after Grand Rapids, with a truss that didn't fly and looked like it was about to fall any minute, I thought it couldn't get worse. Then we hit Milwaukee, where they had Studio Spots hanging from a truss by spansets. What's the big deal, you ask? Well, when you have a moving light fixture on the end of a string (basically), and it starts to swing around with the music, it tends to keep on swinging even when you don't want it to. When Lucas asked the house LD where the Studio Colors were, he told us those were Studio Colors. If you click the links to the photos, you'll see that those two lights are pretty hard to confuse. But that wasn't the best part. The best part was that the guy who supplied the lights, who looked like he got stuck somewhere in 1984, disappeared before everything was working. Suddenly, the house lighting console didn't work. Then the backup broke. Now it's 6 pm, the opener has sound checked, and we still don't have house lights. Awesome. Kip Winger (the lighting contractor) finally showed up at about 6:15 with some little desk that kinda worked, and the show went on.

Which brings us to Indianapolis. I knew we were in trouble when I couldn't even find the truck, because I was at the wrong stage (there's something like 3 stages in this venue.). So when I find the right stage, and see that none of the advance lighting has been hung, it portends a long day. And it has been. I think I can sum it up like this: Lucas' front light is made up of two washes, one blue, one amber. When the house LD walked up to him this morning, held up a piece of clear frost and said "Will this work for your amber wash?" I thought my head would explode.

Ok, so enough about work. Let's talk about the rest of the world:
Tammy Faye Baker Messner died last week. Boo hoo. Her face will still be around for the Rapture, I'm sure. After all, there's nothing natural about it.

Michael Vick's buddy turned around and pleaded guilty, and will probably testify against him. Who would've guessed that a guy who beats on helpless animals and forces them to fight for profit would be so disloyal?

Computerized voting machines have been hacked by a University of California team. Really? Those machines can be hacked? Gosh, and Diebold said they were so secure. Give me a hanging chad.

Apparently, some Japanese feel that history has unfairly made their actions in the Second World War seem brutal and inhuman. Guess what kids: they were. Anyone who tells you that it was a war for survival because the US and Britain were strangling them with economic sanctions is off their nut. Oh, and by the way, it was just that sort of blind, zealous nationalism that made us have to come over there and kick your butts 60 years ago. So cut it out.

So, last but not least, Ingmar Bergman died yesterday. I won't say it was a tragic thing; I mean, come on, the guy was 89; but he did have a great eye for cinema. And a really strange way of looking at the world. And so, I leave you with this:

"I shall remember this moment: the silence, the twilight, the bowl of strawberries, the bowl of milk. Your faces in the evening light. Mikael asleep, Jof with his lyre. I shall try to remember our talk. I shall carry this memory carefully in my hands as if it were a bowl brimful of fresh milk. It will be a sign to me, and a great sufficiency."

Antonius Block, Det Sjunde inseglet (The Seventh Seal)

Some of you faithful readers (read: both of you. Hi Mom!) may remember my rant about MySpace.com from last October. Well, I just caught this little number on Reuters.uk this morning, and I hate to say I told you so, but MySpace is just plain evil. Here's the thing: if they found 29,000 sex offenders, how many are out there that aren't registered or haven't made themselves known yet? Food for thought the next time you let you kid on MySpace.

In other news, this article from the Hartford Courant caught my eye today as well. It really is a bad time for pro sports, with stars and officials running around doing whatever they feel like, and often getting away with it. At what point do we stand up and stop paying attention? How much longer will we continue to fund these billionaires who pay millionaires to act like spoiled children?

So I don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but I found this comic strip a few weeks ago. It's called Lio, and it's really funny (dark, but funny). Here's a sample:

I'm sure we've all been there.

"If we don't change direction soon, we'll end up where we're going."

Professor Irwin Corey (1914 - )

I woke up in Pittsburgh this morning and looked out of the bus window to see this:

Now, I'm not really sure what goes on in a strip district, in fact, I've never even heard of a strip district, but I can't say I've ever seen a city advertise it before.

This is a rather interesting sign that was on the wall outside the theatre. It's good that Pittsburgh tries to keep their city clean by posting signs about not peeing in the street. They need some of these in New York, I think.

Otherwise, P-burgh has been a rough day. Kind of a hostile crew, and I guess the promoter doesn't want to pay for enough guys or something. So yeah, that's about it.

Cleveland went ok, the day off was good. We went over to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and wandered around there: they had an exhibit on the Warped Tour, The Doors, and The Clash. Interesting stuff, but not too exciting, really. I mean, you can only look at so many guitars and pieces of notebook paper with song lyrics on it. But it was a good waste of a few hours, I guess. And we didn't have to pay to get in, because we have tour laminates. So it was worth the money, at least.

On a sadder note, Toby Radloff, Genuine Nerd, could not make the show because he had to work on Tuesday. But Bobby did call him, and had a little chat with him and everything. It would have been supercool if he did come, but life goes on.

So tomorrow is Columbus, OH, and then a nice long drive to Grand Rapids. Hoo boy!

"Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!"

The Dude, The Big Lebowski

Dateline: Cleveland. Apparently, it rocks. Here we are, on the bus, pulling in to Cleveland, OH. We watched American Splendor last night, because it takes place in Cleveland. Bobby, the drum tech, wants to call Tobey Radloff, the Genuine Nerd, and invite him to the show. I'm all for it. He's also taken to calling me Johnny Fontane. I kinda like that, too.

SO Norfolk, VA was kinda fun yesterday. Load in took an hour and a half, which is the fastest so far. It left us about 7 hours to do nothing, so we of course went to the mall across the street. I've come to the conclusion that every mall in America is exactly the same. It's quite boring, really. But the venue, the Norva, was pretty cool. They had a green room with a pool table, ping pong, foosball, and other stuff; as well as a hot tub and sauna in the dressing room. Not too shabby.

I didn't know this, but Norfolk is home of Michael Vick, the latest in the NFL's line of disappointments. Is it just me, or does it seem like the NFL and NBA have more violent and drug offenders than other sports? Or is it just more publicized?

Well, we're at the hotel now. I think I'm going to go wander around downtown Cleveland and see what there is to see. Hopefully something. Hasta la pasta!

"Foolish writers and readers are created for each other."

Horace Walpole (1717 - 1797)

And so, here I am, day 3 of the Interpol tour. So far, so good. Day one was a little slow, but, hey, what can you expect from the hands at a ballroom in Rochester NY? Day two was much better, Atlantic Shitty, NJ: hey, at least we had real stagehands. The "rig" was up in 2 hours (pretty f'n good) but then the video bit me in the butt... as it tends to do. Ah well. Day 3 should be better.

Here's a fun little pic that I have from the hotel in day one. After all, who couldn't use a little ball room? Well, typing on a bus kinda sucks, since I can't seem to put together one sentence without a bump going by. Talking to you soon....

"When the habitually even-tempered suddenly fly into a passion, that explosion is apt to be more impressive than the outburst of the most violent amongst us."

Margery Allingham, Death of a Ghost, 1934

Potential robber disarmed by taste of a fine bordeaux

Because sometimes life is just too bizarre to be real....

"What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet."

Woody Allen (1935 - )

So, I know I promised a rant about Scooter Libby, but I have something else to do first. Seeing as this is the 4th of July, and 231 years ago a bunch of white guys got together in Philadelphia to set out their beliefs about government and humanity; and since that little meeting has become the basis for our system of government today, I thought I would do a little analysis of the Declaration of Independence.

Now, I don't know the last time you actually read Mr. Jefferson's little note to King George, but if you're like most Americans, you haven't. Oh, sure, you've seen the thing, and you might even know that it says "In Congress, July 4, 1776" at the top. You might even recognize the opening ("When in the course of human events...", not "We the People..." That's the Constitution.) Aside from the first sentence of the second paragraph ("We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.") you probably don't know any other words from the whole document, other than John Hancock's huge signature (sorry Mr. Farley, it's not Herbie Hancock.)

So where am I going with this? Well, the first paragraph speaks of the dissolution of political ties. Jefferson speaks of the rule of the British crown over the American colonies. Can we take the meaning into a modern context and say that the Federal government needs to be dissolved? I think that's a bit much, even though the system as it is is grossly inept and needs to be rethought. And I will say that there are certain political ties in our government today that do need to be dissolved. But we'll get into that later.

Paragraph two is the most famous, and the one which applies most to our current government. In it, Jefferson speaks of "Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness," three unalienable rights which no government may curtail. In fact, Jefferson says that it is the purpose of government to protect these rights above all else. Government is created by the consent of the people; and it must be removed when it violates that trust. Jefferson goes on to say that the complete removal of government is a messy thing, and should only be undertaken when absolutely necessary. In fact, he observes that humans are more likely to suffer small abuses than change a broken system. But at what point do the abuses become too big to suffer? Apparently, it is after a "long train of abuses and usurpations" shows a pattern of "Despotism" and "Tyranny." Have we seen anything like despotism or tyranny from the Bush administration? Have they done anything in the last 6 years to violate the pursuit of life, liberty, or happiness? Where to start? Let's use Mr. Jefferson's words, from the Declaration itself: ("He" of course being King George. Which one, the Third or the Bush, is up to you to decide.)

"He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good."

- there's a long list here, including stem cell research, funding for the environment and public schools, sex education, the Kyoto treaty, the START treaties, and so on. But this accusation can be leveled at any president and his administration. It just seems like this guy has some real no-brainers on his list.

"He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only."

-Now, here, Jefferson was talking about the American colonies and their lack of representation in the British Parliament, which was a cornerstone of the American Revolution. While the President has not tried to make anyone give up representation in Congress, the phrasing here could apply to two current events that would have benefited a large number of people and only inconvenienced few: the funding for the Iraq war and Social Security "reform." Now, as far as funding for Iraq goes, we all know how Congress was ready to pass a bill calling for all US troops to be out of Iraq on a set schedule, and Bush said he would veto such a bill. He then went on to veto a spending bill with a time limit, effectively leaving our soldiers in a war zone with no money to buy bullets. Since no Congressman (and, I would hope, no person) in their right mind would allow such a thing, Georgie got his appropriations bill passed, and the war drags on. Second is the Social Security debate, which went something like this: Bush and his administration decided that Social Security needs to be reformed to make it last more than 40 more years. But he never laid out a plan to do it that didn't involve his buddies on Wall Street getting fatter and richer off of our retirement money (which they already are). His plan was to basically go to Vegas and bet all of Social Security on red. Great idea George. And what happened when Congress said "We believe you. We'll work with you. Just give us a plan that makes sense"? The response was "We have a plan, but you have to agree to it before we tell you." So, long story short, the Bush administration has refused to pass laws affecting a large number of people, unless those people agree to unreasonable demands.

"He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures."

-now, this one is a slight detour as well, but in the same vein. You see, our legislative branch hasn't been holding meetings in strange places; but the justice department has. And whenever anyone has asked about it, the answer has been "USA Patriot Act." "9-11." and "Terrorism."

"He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people."

- While Georgie hasn't dissolved any houses lately, he has allowed some redistricting to go on that is questionable at best. His Attorney General should have investigated and prosecuted someone over the redistricting in Texas that created 5 more Republican Congressmen and eliminated 2 Democrats.
On a side note, I'm not really sure what Jefferson meant by "manly firmness," but I think it's safe to say that's not meant to be as gay as it sounds. Moving on:

"He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands."

- I think that one's pretty cut and dry: he wants to build a fence along the Mexican border, after all.

"He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers."

- Finally, we see what Scooter Libby has to do with this whole thing. Now, while Georgie has no say on the laws for "establishing Judiciary Powers," he has done lots and lots of obstructing "the Administration of Justice." Commuting Scooter Libby's jail sentence is just the latest and greatest hit from that group, which includes Mr. Cheney Doesn't Have to Tell You a Damn Thing, We Don't Have to Have a Reason For Firing Federal Attorneys, Who Cares If She's a Mindless Sycophant, She's Perfect for Chief Justice, and that all-time classic, Yes, Iraq Really Does Have WMD, and Saddam Planned 9-11. The fact of the matter is that this administration has never really had a need for truth and justice, so long as they had 9-11 and a mandate from a higher power, they were good to go.

"He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance."

-Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you, the White House Office of Faith Based and Community Initiatives. Separation of church and state my butt.

"He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power."

-I'm not even gonna touch this one. If you've been paying attention at all, you know.

"For protecting them (soldiers), by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:"

- Now, while we haven't seen too many murders on "Inhabitants of these States" by our own soldiers (though a few PTSD cases have trickled into the news); we have seen gross violations of international law by American soldiers in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Guantanamo Bay. And have we seen one trial that wasn't a farce? Has even one officer gone in front of a court martial for any of it?

"For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:"

- Again, not us, but alleged "terrorists." If we expect the rest of the world to play by our rules, then WE need to play by our rules too.

"He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us."

-While he's not waging war on us, I have to wonder how many victims on Hurricane Katrina fell like the government is protecting us...

"In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people."

The First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States reads: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." The American people have been using that right to free speech to petition the government for a redress of grievances for at least 4 years now. Bush's approval rating peaked at 90% in October of 2001. This is the highest number since Gallup started the poll in 1938, and probably the highest number since the other George W.; General Washington himself. Today, Bush's approval rating is 27%. Since his reelection in 2004, his approval has gone from 51% to 27%. If that doesn't meant that most of the country (65% at the time of this writing) is looking for a "redress of grievances," then I don't know what does. How has the President responded to these low polls? By ignoring it. Acting like he still has a "mandate" from the people to do whatever he thinks is necessary. Well, guess what, George: you don't. You work for us. For a guy who is 3% points from Nixon, you sure don't seem to care.

Well, after all this rambling and ranting, I'll close it up. We live in a world that is so much smaller and faster than it was 10 years ago. We cannot even begin to imagine what life was like in 1776. Yet, 231 years later, we still celebrate an act of courage that we cannot even fathom. And even though our government and way of life is beginning to take on the same bad habits that have felled every human empire to come before; we can still do something about it. Our system allows for an orderly and bloodless change of government; the type of revolution that makes documents like the Declaration of Independence a wonderful piece of history and not a necessary political tool.

"But a Constitution of Government once changed from Freedom, can never be restored. Liberty, once lost, is lost forever."

John Adams (1735 - 1826)

Ok, so here's the scoop: I'm going on tour with Interpol (the band, not the police). Tour starts the 17th of July and ends the 5th of August. We'll be hitting Detroit, Chicago, Kantucky, and Bal-mer, so check the schedule! If things go well, this could be a regular gig, so who knows?

And just in case you think I haven't been paying attention: there's a rant brewing about Scooter Libby and his get out of jail free card... I just don't have time to put all that vitriol down now, but it's comin'....


"Democracy is a process by which the people are free to choose the man who will get the blame."

Laurence J. Peter (1919 - 1988)


Uh, 'parently not, Larry.